Hey there, readers!  Happy August!  Time to start off this month how we always do here on the blog: with a challenge.  This month, I challenge you to figure out your own and your spouse’s love language, then make sure to show your spouse love in their language at least twice during the month.

Umm… Love Languages?

Did I lose you there?  The 5 Love Languages were introduced in a book of the same name by Gary Chapman.  Basically, different people show (and like to be shown) love in different ways.  This applies to all relationships, not just romantic ones, by the way.  Maybe you prefer to hear Words of Affirmation (that’s me!) or receiving Gifts from a loved one.  Perhaps you most appreciate spending Quality Time with that person, or having Acts of Service done on your behalf.  

If your spouse is a Physical Touch person and you brush them away when they come in for a hug, it might especially hurt them.  But you might not even notice they are trying to show you love because you are “speaking a different language”… A different love language!  Learning what your love language is and what your spouse’s is can be so helpful.  You might start to notice ways they are showing you their love that you were missing before.  And you can be on the lookout for ways to show love in their love language, not just your own.

Why does this matter?

Here’s just a quick example of how important it is to speak one another’s love languages. One evening, I was feeling totally burned out and unappreciated after a day of laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning, watching the kids… ETC! I vented to Chris about it. As an “Acts of Service” love language person, Chris’ response was that he would make sure to do the dishes the following night. I was genuinely surprised that this is what he had gotten from the conversation.

“I don’t need or even particularly want you to do the dishes. I don’t mind doing the dishes. I just want you to thank me for doing them and tell me you appreciate me!” Again, I’m a “Words of Affirmation” person. Chris wanted to love me by doing the Act of Service… but if he had, it probably wouldn’t have registered with me as love as much as him just taking the time to thank me! We both would’ve missed out on this opportunity to show/ be shown love if we didn’t think about our different love languages.

Take the quick and easy quiz here to get started.  Then, if you’re feeling it, explore more of the site.  There are lots of helpful resources there, plus quizzes about Apology Languages and Anger Assessment, too.  (One thing you should know about me… I love personality quizzes and all that jazz.)  Think of at least two specific ways you will show your spouse love in their language during August… and let us know what you are doing in the comments below!

Update on last month’s challenge

Finally, a quick recap of how our last challenge went for Chris and me.  In July, our challenge was to pray a novena to St. Anne, mother of Mary and grandmother of Jesus.  Not for the first time, our intention for this novena was that my book project would move forward in the direction God intends.  It helped me feel more at peace about how my project is going, even in a time when it feels like things have stalled somewhat. I find that this is often the case with prayer… When I pray for something to change because it is stealing my peace, the prayer doesn’t actually change the circumstance but instead helps restore my peace anyway. Has that happened to you, also?

St. Anne, mother of the Virgin Mary and grandmother of Jesus, pray for us!